Christian Formation
- A Small Tin Can by Susan Rust
- This is God’s House, First and Last by Laura Gunn
- Gladness in the House of the Lord by Martin Hall
A Small Tin Can by Susan Rust
My mother was born in Korea during the Japanese occupation.
In her elementary school, which was set up in a Buddhist monastery, she was in charge of the one object the entire school had to play with during recess - a small tin can.
At the end of recess, she would carefully wrap it and place it back in its hiding place, which was in the nook of a large tree in the courtyard.
She did this every day so the Japanese soldiers wouldn't confiscate their only toy. That sense of scarcity and apprehension never left my mother.
With this as our family backdrop, we grew up modestly and we saved.
We lived slightly in anticipation of rainy days, knowing that they could be right around the corner. And money? - money was the shield and safety blanket that would ward off those unfortunate storms.
We clipped coupons, we conserved energy, we carefully saved our wrapping paper each Christmas. We wrapped and rewrapped each box with the same paper so many times that eventually scotch tape was unnecessary. The wrapping paper would gently fold itself around the box. It had its own memory of where it should be.
When my mother died just a few years ago, I found our old wrapping paper carefully laid out in a chest. She had written in a little corner, the date she purchased it, 1967.
As with all things at St. Paul's, when asked to speak I had to reflect on my own values and my own traditions. But more importantly I would have to open myself up and talk about it.
For me pledging is not very sexy - the act of pledging is quite ordinary. Pledging doesn't create any fanfare or glory. Much of it is used for things unseen or taken for granted. Much of our pledge pays the water and the light bill. It buys a new trash can, brochures, toner, coffee filters and then it's gone.
And that's what makes the act of pledging perfect.
We all have opportunity to give or do work that gets recognized or invest in projects that yield immediate results. And we should continue to do those things. But a pledge is something different. The blessing for me in stewardship is to give in the absence of worldly acknowledgments AND to have it be my private conversation with God.
We all have our own conversations about God and Money, we all give for different reasons: Habit, Admiration, Ideology, Respect, Guilt, Generosity, Joy, Duty, Concern, Love, Fear, Gratitude, Thanksgiving… and of course I give with a mix of all these things.
But what's true for me is that:
I give even though it goes against the fabric of my life.
I give because I have Faith that there will be enough.
I give because it's the act of letting go.
So today,
I tear wrapping paper,
I buy something – even when it's not on sale,
and sometimes I live on the edge
and I pledge generously to St. Paul's.
I can do this
because I know
that GOD is a WONDERFUL umbrella
and HE will take care of that rainy day around the corner.
Susan Rust is Managing Director of Green Bird Media who creates our website.
This is God’s House, First and Last by Laura Gunn
Scott called me to do this right after the memorial service for Margaret Cargill. It was a good time to ask me – that was an amazing service. Bishop Chane talked about Margaret as a true angel – someone who appeared in response to a prayer and helped in a time of great need. She was a real inspiration, as are others who have used their wealth to try to help cure the ills of the world.
But, we’re not all Bill Gates, or Warren Buffet, or Margaret Cargill. The rest of us come from a more modest place financially. So, why should we be generous?
Everyone has a different reason. I was looking at the stewardship talks that Susan and Martin gave and feeling a little inadequate. I don’t have anything in my background that makes for such a compelling narrative. I grew up in a privileged environment. We were comfortable financially.
What I do have is a huge amount of gratitude for my life. I grew up during a time when a lot of us, as teenagers, died young. We engaged in a lot of really destructive behavior. We died of drug overdoses, or in spectacular car accidents, or, later, we died of AIDS. And I was exactly the kind of person to whom something like that should have happened. I had a thousand narrow squeaks, hundreds of close shaves. And I am somehow not only still here, but thriving. I have absolutely nothing to do with that. God did that.
So, one reason I’m generous is that God has been so generous to me. Everything I have comes from God. The wherewithal to get and hold a job. The ability and desire to work hard for my paycheck. My husband and family. It’s all a gift.
Somehow, I have been blessed with the desire to seek out and follow God. That desire got me to St. Paul’s Cathedral. It felt right from the moment I first read the statement on the door and came in, and it has felt right for seven years now.
It doesn’t always feel like a perfect fit. Sometimes people I like leave, or think about leaving, because they feel like there is no place for them here for one reason or another. I watched a TV show recently in which someone said, “we live in a world where half the people hate the other half.” We live in divided times, not only in the world but also in our church. I hate that our church is mostly in the news for splitting apart. Church ought to be a place where, instead of focusing on how right we are and how wrong the other side is, we set aside our differences and come together in the name of God.
How does all this translate into choosing to be generous?
What we have in common is our love for God. If we didn’t love God, we wouldn’t show up here on Sundays and take on a ridiculous number of volunteer commitments. Our primary purpose here is putting our faith into action. This Cathedral helps the poor, the sick, the imprisoned and their families. Despite our differences, this is God’s house first and last. To me, that means that it doesn’t have to be a perfect fit all the time.
We also help each other. We pray for each other and visit each other in the hospital. When my father died of Alzheimer’s disease last year, when my husband and I went through some personal tragedies this year, St. Paul’s was there for us in a dozen different ways.
So, another reason I’m generous is that St Paul’s has been generous to me.
A third reason is my mom. She died when I was 26. She was great. She was funny, loving, and extremely generous to her church and the people around her. She believed that money and abundance were like a living stream. Good things come to us and so good things must also flow out, or we stagnate. I saw a sign yesterday that said, “giving is living”. That reminded me of her. I try to be as much like her as possible. Being generous is a way to honor her.
I give because I am so grateful for what I have been given. As I ask God to guide me through life, I am finding that my path gets narrower. In a way it’s selfish – I choose to be generous because I couldn’t live with myself if I weren’t.
I give generously because it’s a tangible way I can honor and give thanks to God.
Laura Gunn has been a Deputy District Attorney for San Diego for ten years. Before that she worked in the San Diego City Attorney's Criminal Division.
Gladness in the House of the Lord by Martin Hall
The Psalmist David said:
“I was glad when they said unto me, let us go into the House of the Lord.”
The first House of the Lord that I knew was Gospel Assembly Church in St Louis, Missouri. My first blessing in life was my fine Christian parents, who loved God, prayed daily in our home and actively participated in four services a week. We were “Pentecostal.”
Now, just for clarification, we did not cast out demons and I was never asked to dance with rattlesnakes in the sanctuary. But we did speak in tongues and from a young age I knew the power of the Holy Spirit.
Sadly, as a young adult my participation ended in the Pentecostal church. For more than 25 years I searched for a church home that would welcome me. On February 6th, 2005, at the invitation of our friend Deedra Hardman, my partner Robert and I entered the doors of this Cathedral for the first time.
I was deeply moved by what I heard, saw and felt:
-The beautiful music of our choir-The procession of the Priests- The children-The candles-The incense-The men in purple robes with sticks over their shoulders, (which I later learned we call Vergers)-The altar-The bread-The wine. These were all new to me; you see, we did not have any of this in our Pentecostal Church.
Our Dean, Scott Richardson, gave a life changing invitation that day when he said, “Whoever you are, and wherever you find yourself on your spiritual journey, you are most welcome to participate fully in our worship, including receiving the bread and wine made holy”.
Receive the bread and wine made holy, me, I could receive the bread and wine made holy. Again, this was new to me. I thought about this for some weeks, and read every thing I could find about receiving communion. After praying about it, I came forward and Dean Scott served my first communion at this altar.
At another service I heard the angelic voice of my now beloved Reverend Cannon Allisyn Thomas as “she” sang prayers and “she” presided over the Mass. In that same service I was moved to tears by the inspiring sermon delivered by Reverend David Norgard, and later learned that he is a gay priest.
I knew the Holy Spirit had led us to this place. We had found a place where the diversity of God’s human creation assembles to worship. Later, while listening to one of Dean Scott’s inspiring sermons I heard the Holy Spirit say: “Come unto me all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest… my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
What peace to have found this resting place for my soul.
Robert and I attended Canon Allisyn’s "What is an Episcopalian" classes. Our Bishop James Mathes received and confirmed us at Easter.
To answer Dean Richardson’s question why do we pledge?… How could we not! After receiving so much from God at St. Paul’s Cathedral it was both a duty and an expression of gratitude to give back in every way including generously of our finances.
I am grateful that the Holy Spirit led us to this place. And I am equally grateful that when we came you were here, all of you.
Thank you! Thank you not just for being here,
Thank you for the prayers that you have prayed within these walls,
the candles and the incense that you have burned to God’s Glory.
Thank you Martin, Rueben, and choir members for the hours you have spent practicing songs to sing and providing such inspiring music for our services.
Thank you for the pledges you have made and the money that you have contributed to support all of the good works of this Cathedral.
Thank you for the countless ways you reflect the love of Christ.
Today, I can say as David;
I was glad when they said unto me, let us go into “THIS” House of the Lord.
Martin Hall is Director of Catering & Conference Services at Paradise Point Resort & Spa.
